What Would be the Benefits of Having Doula During My Delivery?
Has anyone ever used a doula? A friend of my mom's is training to be a doula. She's pretty qualified considering that she's had 8 kids naturally...And she needs to participate in 3 births in order to be certified. She asked my mom if I would consider letting her be a part of our birth and she'll obviously be my doula for free...I'm fine with it, and actually would love to have someone around who doesn't get queasy at the sight of needles or blood (hubby is guilty of that). Hubby isn't comfortable with it and wants it to be just us. I know it's his experience too, but I feel like I'm the one who will be in labor and he hasn't been exactly helpful when it came time for the epidural or needles...which makes me feel as though I'm totally alone with strangers when these times come up. Besides--he spent most of my labor on his laptop when I was in labor with Aiden--and it wasn't until I mustered up all the strength that I had to say that "I don't feel so well" that he realized my BP had dropped dangerously low 44/29 and hit the nurse call button for me...It would be really nice to have someone who is by my side paying attention to me the whole time. I don't mean to make my hubby sound bad. He is great and very supportive...but he is a guy and has never been on the birthing end of childbirth...
So just curious...anyone have thoughts on doulas? What do they do besides assisting with the birth? Do you have to go natural if you use a doula? I'm still not sure I can handle natural childbirth since I've only ever done an epidural...
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Hi Elsie,
I didn't use a doula with Joa but I've read many positive things about them.
Basically, I think having a doula can't hurt. Like Mikki said, it also does not interfere with your other plans, it only enhances them.
I'd say go for it.
Debra
Hi Elsie - a doula is also referred to as a midwife nurse, they are a highly qualified labor coach and are there to assist you every step of your labor and birth. Some doulas even stay on after the birth to assist in breastfeeding, and dietary needs. It depends on the doula and the parents of course. When I first looked into being a doula my midwife explained that I would be trained enough to actually handle the delivery in the event of an emergency or the midwife arrives too late
Really, having a doula is great. They can provide the emotional support us laboring moms need, are very skilled in breathing and relaxation excersises, can assist in you proper body position to allow for natural progression of birth, and recognize if something is not right. The good news is this won't interfere with your husbands participation either.
Since your mom's friend is in training she has learned all the stuff mentioned in her studies (and first hand experience) but may not think of everything during your labor, even still I believe having her there will really help your labor feel more natural and relaxed allowing you to possibly hold off on the epidural longer (or all together if you get the courage to go)
And finally, no you don't have to have a natural delivery to utilize the skill of a doula. I participated in two births as a doula and both moms used an epidural when they reached third stage labor. My job was still a blessing for them because both moms were birthing alone, and because they had an experienced person there talking to them face to face, helping them to be calm and take contractions one at a time, sometimes husbands can forget to do this anyway.
Perhaps if your husband looked at her participation as a means to help the two of you both focus on a calm, relaxing birth because he can focus on fewer things in regards to the actual labor and place more attention on others. For example (and you determine what your hubby likes more) instead of counting down through contractions and squeezing your hand, he can be the one that gives back rubs and offers you ice chips
I found this post and thought it would be a great way to share with your husband how having a doula could benefit both of you and help in your decision on whether or not to have her participate.
http://www.americanpregnancy.org/labornbirth/havingadoula.html
Mikki Hogan Publisher of UniqueParenting.com