Coping With Competition

One of the consequences of our aggressive modern culture is an increasing emphasis on competitive sports and activities for even very young children. Now, don’t get me wrong. I am one of the most competitive people I know, and I always play to win. However, I am also very conscious that children need to know the joy of playing just for the sake of fun. There is plenty of time to teach the importance of teamwork and success as they get older.

The Big Dangers of Competitive Sports

While there are many virtues to competition, there are also some significant drawbacks that parents need to be mindful of.

• Injury: Children who are highly competitive themselves, or have highly competitive parents pushing them are much more likely to get injured while playing a sport. Likewise, they are more likely to make an injury worse by playing even while in pain.
• Misplace Priorities: Children are, by nature, dreamers. If they can dribble a ball, they can be a professional athlete. If they can swim fast, they can see themselves winning Olympic gold. That’s why many high school students feel perfectly comfortable neglecting their homework to practice for the major leagues.
• Delay Adulthood: This is obviously more of a problem with older teens and young adults than children. However, the seeds are often sown at an early age. Some teens become so obsessed with playing games that they plan their entire lives around their team. This can lead to them turning down job offers and even flunking out of college.
• Failure to Handle Failure: When winning is everything, losing can easily lead to depression and even self-harm. Some teens go as far as binge drinking or drug use to assuage the sense of worthlessness they feel when the team they’re on loses.

What We Can Do

The first and most important thing a parent can do to avoid this situation is to give their kids a strong sense of self-worth. If a child feels good about himself, he won’t have to depend on athletic prowess to bolster his self-confidence. Parents can do this by praising their child’s natural talents, and diminishing the importance of things he may not be good at.

Also, it is important that we train our children to enjoy physical activity. At home, we train on our Schwinn recumbent bikes, which allows us to still work out when the weather outside is bad. Likewise, when I push myself to do a few more laps on one of the Horizon Fitness ex-59 elliptical trainers at the gym, it’s not so I can beat the guy next to me. It’s so that I can feel good about the healthy changes I am making in my body.

Finally, avoid the “soccer mom” and “Little League dad” syndromes. If your child likes a sport, take him to practice and leave him there. Don’t sit around and second guess what his coach is telling him. Always go to the games and cheer him on, but be ready to say “nice try” with a big smile if things don’t go so well. After all, physical prowess is fleeting, but relationships last a lifetime.

About the Author

Melissa Cameron, who is married with two children, lives in Austin, Texas next to her elderly parents. Melissa leads a full life that includes a productive career as a freelance writer and spending time with her extended family. She loves writing about various subjects including parenting, local history and living a frugal life. She also enjoys searching the Internet for bargains and researching ideas for articles.